Your Primary Goal in Your Life: Start with Loving You First!

By Earlyn Sharpe

For many women, this is such a foreign concept to love oneself first. Some may even think that it is selfish and not worthy of practicing unless they want to deviate from past generations’ teachings that taught women to settle for the first runner up position and not first place because it’s a man’s world. Many women fought and are still fighting for equal rights for women.

To these femsoldiers, we are grateful daily as they keep pushing the boundaries and screaming in the face of injustices on behalf of us. Today I would like you to take the first step of healing by looking at your scars and being kind to you first.

woman in black shirt holding red lipstick

It begins with you having ONE THING! In place, while you move through life journey and I call it STANDARDS. Now you may be wondering what is the meaning of STANDARDS within the context of Loving You First. Your STANDARDS sets the level of sound quality treatment that you desire as a woman and is morally correct by every measure.

photo of woman wearing black tank top

Take the first step and set your standards. Put your pen or keypad to work and make a list of your negotiables and nonnegotiable. Be very clear on what you will compromise on and in which circumstance would it be acceptable. Rate it against your value system. What are the things that are dear to your heart that is worth compromising or fighting for every day?

excited multiethnic young female friends waving hands and taking selfie

To help you with this joyous task, put it into categories of the following areas that would impact your life. Let’s build those standards, ladies.

Your mental health— What do you want for you? How would you safeguard you? What is negotiable and nonnegotiable?

Your family —  Family first? What does that mean to you? What is negotiable and nonnegotiable?

Your friendships — Who belongs in your inner circle? Why? What is negotiable and nonnegotiable?

Your career/business — Your Why? What is negotiable and nonnegotiable?

Your romantic relationships — Who is your soul mate? What makes that person your soul mate? Your negotiable and nonnegotiable?

Your emotions — How do you master healthy emotions? How do you keep you, in-check? What is negotiable and nonnegotiable?

Your social environment — How would you navigate uncharted waters? What is negotiable and nonnegotiable?

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Maybe you have an area that you would like to add to complete your list. Do not hesitate to make this your own and add or delete what’s right for you. Let me know how it is working for you. Remember to drop me a few lines in the comments as you Start Loving You First. I’ll love to hear from you all.

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